Boomer Women Plan To Spend Retirement "Giving Back"

The New Retirement Survey by Merrill Lynch gives us all an insightful look at what we can expect from the boomer generation during their retirement years. Surprisingly, the generation that has been widely known for their self-centered ways responded that they plan to focus their time and efforts during retirement towards others and causes that they are passionate about.

Consider the following information about boomers as reported in the New Retirement Survey:

• 67% state that continued mental stimulation and challenge is what will motivate them to continue work as opposed to only 37% who cite continued earnings as the reason they plan to be active in the workforce
• Boomers are now ten times more likely to “put others first” than “put themselves first”
• Boomer women are better educated, more independent, and more financially engaged than any generation in history
• Married boomer women are more than six times more likely to share responsibility for savings and investments compared to their mothers’ generation
• Boomer women view their empty nest and retirement as an opportunity for career development, community involvement and continued personal growth

Midlife Women Today Have the Financial Resources, Skills and Confidence To Act On Their Impulses

The 'midlife crisis' has long been thought of as something that afflicts men and often involves red sports cars and trophy wives. But the Wall Street Journal's Work & Family columnist, Sue Shellenbarger, says that as gender roles change, women are increasingly experiencing their own version of these upheavals.

I quote from her book, The Breaking Point: How Female Midlife Crisis is Transforming Today's Women:

"This pattern of female midlife crisis is emerging now because, to put it simply, women are different today. For the first time in history, women not only face more of the kind of stresses that tend to bring on midlife crises, but they also have the financial muscle, the skills and the confidence to act out their frustrations and resolve them. In a sense, women are having midlife crises now because they can."

It's a fact that women today have the financial strength needed to act on midlife rebelliousness. "Nearly one-third of wives now outearn their husbands," writes Shellenbarger, "and the proportion of women earning more than $100,000 tripled in the past decade. All this gives women a sense of freedom at midlife. 'My successful, satisfying career allowed me to be very independent, with a cocky attitude that sparked to a full-blown midlife crisis,' says a California saleswoman in my study." Women also have the skills and resources to make career changes or start their dream businesses at midlife if they wish.

Do you agree or disagree with Ms. Shellenbarger?

6 Benefits of Owning A Hot Tub

Why own a hot tub? Consider these stress-relieving benefits of hydro-therapy:

1. Reduce stress and relax: Immersing in warm water raises body temperatures, causing blood vessels to dilate which then improves circulation. This process, called vasodilation, creates the perfect environment for relaxation.
2. Sleep better: Soaking in warm water before bedtime allows sleep to come quicker due to a rise in body temperature.
3. Gain relief for arthritis, aches and stiffness: Warm, pulsating water increases the blood supply to aching joints, thus reducing inflammation from the area and relieving pain. The warm water also relaxes muscles and allows for greater flexibility.
4. Breathe and think easier: Steam rising off hot water can help open up nasal and bronchial passages to aid in maintaining upper respiratory health. Many people find that soaking in a hot tub relieves headache pain, especially pain from tension headaches.
5. Improve cardio health: Soaking in hot water gives many of the health benefits of exercise with less strain on the heart. It increases the heart rate while it lowers blood pressure, rather than raising it as other forms of exercise do.
6. Relieve back and knee pain: Four out of five Americans suffer from chronic back pain. Warm-water therapy alleviates lower back pain and knee ailments by reducing stress and stiffness.
   

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: Puerto Vallarta Anyone?

Want to go on a fun and relaxing vacation? Book a trip with a friend or group of friends. Celebrate a special birthday or just have a memorable getaway with your gal pals.

Girlfriends traveling to Mexico together through Mexican Destinations enjoy everything from beach side massage treatments and shopping tours, to catered meals and margarita parties. According to Kim Coates, president of Mexican Destinations, "There's a real need for women to get together and rejuvenate. Mothers and daughters, high school and college reunions, and bridesmaids’ escapes are just some of the groups of women who are seeing an emotional value in getting away to reconnect. We want to provide a pampered setting where girls can relax and have fun."

It's offiicial - 'Google' is a verb

Since Google founders Larry Page and Serge Brin brought Google to life in September 1998, the word 'Google' has become synonymous with searching the web and now has been officially classified as a verb.

Google, googled, and googling are words now used so commonly that dictionaries are adding the transitive verb in their upcoming editions.

To be grammatically correct, by the way, use lowercase 'g' when used generically and an uppercase 'G' when referring to the use of the Google search engine.

So have you Googled today?

Midlife Is Like Playing On the Monkey Bars

Today I heard Alan Weiss use an illustration that I've heard before, but it made me think about how it applies to our journey through midlife. He used the illustration of children transversing the monkey bars on a school playground. How do you successfully get from one side to the other? You have to let go of the bar that you're on in order to swing and catch hold of the next bar! If you don't let go, you'll never get to the other side.

What are you hanging onto that you need to let go of before you can move to the next bar on your journey through midlife?

American Bandstand Debuted (1956)

"We're goin' hoppin' (Hop!)
We're goin' hopin' today
Where things are poppin'(Pop!)
The Philadelphia way
We're goin' drop in (Drop!)
On all the music they play
On the Bandstand!"

Gets your feet tapping just thinking about it, doesn't it?

Bandstand began as a local program on WFIL-TV (now WPVI), Channel 6 in Philadelphia on October 7, 1952. Then it was hosted by Bob Horn and was called Bob Horn's Bandstand. On July 9 of 1956 the show got a new host, a clean-cut 26 year old named Dick Clark. When ABC picked the show up, it was renamed American Bandstand, airing it's first national show on August 5, 1957. The show was moved to Los Angeles in 1964. From 1963 to 1987 Bandstand was on only once a week, on Saturday. Briefly it was part of the USA Network with new host David Hirsh but went off the air in 1989.

Brain Power Can Improve with Age

Science has long made us believe that intellectual power declines with age, reaching its peak at 40. But new studies are revealing quite the opposite. Researchers at the University of California at Berkeley interviewed women at ages 27, 43, 52 and 61, and found increased tolerance for the uncertainties of life peaked in the 50s. Studies also show at that age, the left and the right brains tend to work together more -- instead of separately.

You begin to say to yourself, 'What the heck am I afraid of?'' Midlife is a time of confidence and daring mental leaps. For those that take the plunge, it can be the happiest time of your life.

What do you think?

Midlife Remarriage: Blending Families Can Work

With the divorce rate so high for second and subsequent marriages, how do you overcome the statistical odds and create a successful blend of families -- including not only you as a couple, but children from previous relationships, new inlaws, and ex-spouses? To survive, you really need to work together and support one another.

Here are three excellent articles on the subject of midlife remarriage:
Midlife Remarriage
Premium Blend
Stepfamilies: What about the couple relationship?

What have you found to be successful in creating a positive second marriage?

Happy Birthday, Mr. President!

President George W. Bush celebrates his 60th birthday today. He is not alone, however, in crossing this milestone in 2006. Other well-known Boomers turning 60 this year include Laura Bush, Bill Clinton, Donald Trump, Sly Stallone, Diane Keaton, Candice Bergen, Cher, Jimmy Buffett, and Steven Spielberg.

The U.S. Census Bureau says roughly every 11 seconds another Baby Boomer in the United States turns 60. That adds up to about 8,000 every day and almost three million just in 2006.

Although was once thought of as the first year of "old age," age 60 is now considered among many to be only the midpoint of "middle age." Matt Thornhill, who heads the Boomer Project, says, “A Boomer at 60 doesn't consider him or herself old. In fact, they don’t think they are going to be old for another 15 or 20 years.”

This Boomer generation, more so than those that came before, has been open to growth and change. Thornhill says that may be more important now than ever, as Boomers move into a new phase of life far more active and socially aware than past generations.

Midlife Couple Takes Steps to Revitalize Their Marriage

Barbie and Paul Bentley decided to revitalize their 27-year marriage by walking from one of their favorite places to stay – Mary Janes Farm near Moscow, Idaho – to one of their favorite places to eat -- a catfish restaurant in Astor, Florida. The couple calls their trek across America "A Walk for Marriage."

The Bentleys are empty nesters, with a 25-year-old son and a 20-year-old daughter. They contemplated several adventures, but a walk across the nation was something they'd dreamed of when they were much younger. Still, the decision to take action didn't come until their marriage became a bit stale, admitted 49-year-old Paul Bentley.

To get ready for the walk they sold their home, moved into a used 35-foot trailer and quit their jobs. They packed light, planning to sleep in their tent most nights – although once or twice a week they'll stay in motels. They plan to walk between 10 and 15 miles a day, first wandering through north-central Idaho and into Montana. Then they will head south to Wyoming and onward to Colorado, where they plan to break for the winter, working odd jobs to replenish bank accounts.

In May, they plan to resume their trek to Florida, arriving sometime in November of 2007 – an estimated 7 million steps total.

To read their reports from the road, visit the Bentley’s web page.

What “steps” are you willing to take to revitalize your marriage?

Leave Work Behind While On Vacation

As summer heats up, more business travelers are veering off their regular schedules for some much-needed time off. Making the most of that time -- whether you're at home or on a leisure trip -- means disconnecting from what's going on at work.

"It really is critical for people to get time off when they're not tethered to a cell phone or a laptop answering e-mails," said Karon Wright, president and founder of Achievement Partners, an executive coaching and management development firm based in Thousand Oaks, California. "Getting your mind and body back into balance is what time off is all about, and you can't rest and recover if you're not taking your vacation days."

Unplugging from work gets your mind and body in balance. It's important while on vacation to practice "living in the moment." Focus on the person you're spending time with or the activity you're engaged in while you're away from work.

How do you "unplug" away from work?

Caring For An Aging Parent Doesn't Need To Be A Lonely Road

Almost 3 out of 10 individuals age 45 to 64 with unmarried children under 25 in the home -- some 712,000 men and women – are also caring for a senior, according to a new study. More than 80% of these sandwiched individuals work, causing some to reduce or shift their hours or to lose income. Also, many are incurring extra expenses such as renting medical equipment.

It’s no surprise that women are more likely than men to be sandwiched. On average, women spend 29 hours a month providing care to seniors (more than twice as many as the 13 hours spent by their male counterparts). Men typically provide outside home maintenance and transportation assistance while women are more likely to provide personal care such as bathing, dressing or feeding, and in-home care such as food preparation and clean up.

Are you caught in this “Sandwich Generation?”

Get help! Don’t carry the burden all alone. Ask around – there are resources in your community to give you the break that you deserve. Most importantly, find a support system where you can turn to before resentments, conflicts, and everyday stresses build. You owe it to yourself and your family to take care of yourself.

Don't Let Your Midlife Crisis Ruin Your Marriage!

Are you having trouble explaining to your husband what you're going through when you don't really understand it yourself? Midlife transition is both disruptive and scary, creating havoc in otherwise stable relationships.

I hear from dozens of men, "My wife is having a midlife crisis and I don't know what to do!" Past hurts, dimmed hopes, and shattered dreams can send some midlife women into a panic and others into a deep depression. Are your pent up feelings pushing your husband away? I know that you're going through a confusing and frightening time as you're grieving the past and trying to plan for the future, but you need to communicate openly with your partner what you're going through. In most cases, the man in your life wants to help! He loves you and wants to be there for you, but can't understand why you're pushing him away.

This past week, I received an email from a woman that wrote:
"I never knew that a female could have a mid-life crisis. I thought only males went through that! I am 44 years old and have been acting totally out-of-character for me. Recently, I have made some poor choices in my life that have affected everybody that I care about and have almost ruined my marriage of 17 years. When I read about Bring It On!, I felt like you were explaining my life to everyone. I want to order it so I can understand what is happening to me and get my life back on track."

Whether or not you're actually starting to experience perimenopausal symptoms, the hormonal imbalances in your body at this time in your life are likely at the very least to cause unwanted emotional changes. Reassure your guy that he is not to blame for these sudden outbursts or prolonged periods of introspection. Advise him that you may require extra attention, love and outward expressions of care more now than ever before.

Your husband also needs to be aware that a decrease in estrogen in your body can significantly alter how you think and feel about sex. Don't use this as an excuse to ignore his physical needs, however. You just need to talk about all of these changes as a couple and find ways to compensate for the changes both of you may be experiencing.

Hot Flashes Cause Insomnia? Really?

News Flash: Women who suffer hot flashes, especially severe hot flashes, often have trouble sleeping, a new study confirms. Do we really need a study to tell us that?

Seriously, does it take a rocket scientist to make the connection between waking up in a puddle with having difficulty sleeping? Supposedly as many as 85 percent of women going through menopause experience hot flashes. The study says, "Because these unpleasant sensations of intense heat and sweating can occur at night, their presence has been frequently linked to insomnia in menopausal women. As the severity of hot flashes increases, so does the insomnia." Duh!

What relief have you found for hot flashes?

Fading Memory? Make Lists!

"Like it or not, our memory starts eroding from middle age," says University of Toronto psychologist, Fergus Craik. But it's not all bad news. While memory for specific events declines from your 40's on, other types of memory -- well-known words, facts and ideas, and telephone numbers -- can hold up well with advancing age. The key is to make use of lists, calendars, and other prompts to help you stay on track.

What tips have you found useful for improving your memory or coping with memory loss?

Stress Major Contributor to Wrinkles & Weight Gain

Apparently, nagging, unfinished tasks are a major contributor to stress causing wrinkles and weight gain. In other words, my "To Do List" is the culprit behind my sagging skin and cellulite!

So how do we keep from feeling so overwhelmed?

Anyone that knows me well is aware that I'm a raving fan of FlyLady (a.k.a. Marla Cilley, author of Sink Reflections). FlyLady has gone so far as to proclaim every Wednesday as "Anti-Procrastination Day." Personally, I think I will need an entire week, but haven't figured out yet how to get the world to stop long enough so that I can catch up!

Seriously, it's important to set aside regular time each week to face the projects you've been putting off. For me, the tasks that top my list are anything that require me to use technology that I'm unfamiliar with. It's healthy though to recognize your fears and face them head on. Step out of your comfort zone and commit to 15 minutes fully focused on the task you've been putting off. FlyLady says, "You can do anything for 15 minutes!" Chances are that by limiting the amount of time you feel committed to doing the dreaded task, the more likely you will keep on going until the task gets completed.

But what do you do when the backlog is so immense that you don't know where to begin? Break it down into baby steps. Write them down in a logical sequence and then schedule time for each one on your calendar. You'll probably never totally "catch up," but eventually you'll accomplish the important items on your list and either delegate or, if possible, skip the rest of them. Sometimes we're guilty of doing things that are not a priority and feel overwhelmed because we've over scheduled our lives.

Another way to reduce stress is to learn to relax. I think about work most of the time and have trouble "shutting off" that part of my brain. I have to force myself to relax, either by spending time alone (stretching, reading, praying) or spending time with family and friends. But when I do, I invariably enjoy the "downtime" and discover that I'm able to return to my work refreshed and rejuvenated with more mental clarity and an increased level of creativity. Now I have the added benefit of slowing down the aging process as well. Hey, I think it's time for another day off!

Treat Yourself Right: Take Time to Peel the Oranges!

In my ongoing effort to lose weight, I've been noticing the difference between how thin people eat compared to those of us that are always trying to shed a few pounds. Here's what I've observed: When faced with cake, cookies, or chips, women who appear to be "naturally thin" are able to enjoy a bite or two and then stop while I, on the other hand, have great difficulty ignoring an open bag of M&M's. In fact, there's times of the month when I'll seek out my favorite comfort foods like a heat-seeking missile!

Did you ever notice how the experts alway say to keep that stuff out of the house? That's great if you live alone, but I have four teenagers. What am I to do? That mere fact alone can send me to the nearest stash of chocolate chip cookies!

Truth be told, I actually prefer a fresh piece of fruit to a Girl Scout Thin Mint, but I'm lazy. The other day the remains of a box of thin mints lay open on the counter (already raided by one of the kids) right next to an orange. While the orange actually looked more appetizing, I finished off the last couple of cookies because who's got time to peel and slice an orange? I know, I know...that quality of life stuff. If I'm going to treat myself right and enjoy my life, I have to learn to take time to peel the oranges!

Is Soya Your Weapon Against Fighting Menopause Blues?

Research conducted by a team at All India Institute of Medical Sciences (AIIMS) has shown that women can handle the post-menopausal syndrome better if they consume more soya.

Menopause, a transition time for women in their 40's and 50's, occurs when estrogen production falls below a certain level and ovulation stops. The changes associated with menopause can lead to increased risk for cardiovascular disease, high cholesterol, blood pressure, osteoporosis, and joint aches. This study brings hope to millions of women worldwide who go through the blues in the middle of their life. Since soya contains a high level of phytoestrogens, which are related in structure to estrogens, they are useful in reducing post menopausal symptoms like chest pain, hot flashes, aches, vaginal dryness and mood swings.

What has worked for you in combatting menopause symptoms?

Is It Time To Make Some of Those Big Life Changes?

Are you fed up with your overstuffed schedule, poor eating habits, and "living to excess?" If so, it's time for a change! Start by making a list of all the things in your life that you're sick of -- running through the drive-thru, working weekends, going out every night with friends, not having any time to yourself. Now turn these negatives into positive statements: "I want to plan healthy meals, " "I want to relax and enjoy my weekends," or "I want to carve out time in my schedule for spending time alone."

Next you need to create a strategy for implementing some of these changes one step at a time:

• Cancel weeknight social activities in an effort to simplify your schedule
• Say "no" to weekend work requests to cut down on your time at the office
• Create room in your schedule for a healthy amount of sleep
• Carve out time for daily exercise to boost your metabolism and energy level
• Make plans to meet a friend for breakfast on Saturday morning
• Take a Sunday afternoon to visit a museum or walk through an art gallery
• Schedule a facial or massage and start taking care of yourself
• Practice caution in not overpacking your schedule with activities intended to achieve life-enriching goals

Finally, focus on the benefits you will start to experience as you begin to implement each of these changes. Expect some obstacles, but don't give up. It will be worth it in the long run. And you don't have to make all these changes overnight! Pick one and work on that until it's part of your lifestyle. Then move onto the next one. Success breeds success.

What lifestyle changes have you incorporated into your life lately?